A Butterfly in the making...

Lately, I have been thinking about the "best" me. Meaning, am I trying to be the best I can be in all areas of my life? The answer is no. And I am beginning a path to change that. I want to be the best daughter, sister, friend, employee, etc. that I can be, and I realized that all of those things start with me being happy with myself. It all starts with me. One of the things I am unhappiest with right now is my weight. I am going to be 29 in December and realize that I have to start thinking about my health long-term and about all the things that I am doing that may not be the best for me. I am a pretty confident individual...on the outside (This reminds me of my friend Shauna's post from yesterday--PUBLIC me vs. PRIVATE me). The PUBLIC me is confident, the PRIVATE me wishes she could change a few things about herself. I would normally NEVER talk about that in PUBLIC. Never. But I am going to talk about it here in hopes of getting encouragement and even sharing this struggle that any of you feel as well.

I need to start being conscious of what I eat and more importantly, I need to start working out. Luckily, I have 2 options there...a free gym at work and a free gym at home. Both state of the art, both footsteps from my door. There is not one reason, other than insecurities & pure laziness, for me not to be working out everyday. So, my co-worker, Crystal (she's my best friend here @ work) and I have vowed to do the treadmill/bikes @ lunch everyday and bring our lunches. I think having someone do it with me and hold me accountable will make all the difference in the world. It's hard to believe that I will be able to stick with this after so many failed attempts, but it has to at some point, right? I feel different now... like I HAVE to do this, not NEED to do this. I want to be the best version of me and this is the beginning. I am also going to begin Weight Watchers. Mainly because I need the accountability of having to go weigh each week. I have done WW successfully before and am determined to make sure this will be a long term commitment (since it obviously has not been before.) I really believe that if I become active and lose some weight it will affect all aspects of my life in positive ways. I have a good amount to lose, so it will be a long term process, so I would like to set a goal to achieve.

I want to lose 40 pounds by my 29th birthday.

My goal is set, and you are all here to hold me accountable. Each week I will let you know how much I lost that week and will (no doubt!) be blogging about my challenges. I do not need to be a size 0, just a healthy, strong, energetic version of me. So, this weekend I will be attending weight watchers and begin working out. This weekend will be the beginning of the best me!

This perfectly describes what I am feeling at the moment:


Now I have the difficult task of deciding whether to document all of this with pictures.. beginning with a "before" shot. Yikes... I would have to get a lot of encouraging comments to do that!!